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It seems that society is set up to try to convince you that your life is horrible. No that's not right, more that *you* are sort of horrible if your life is not a certain way, which is nearly any way that doesn't involve some high beauty standard and some idealized (but likely not really ideal) family/social standard, and lots and lots and lots of stuff! And people wait to live, thinking they need more things and that they don't have enough money yet to reach the place that life and happiness starts.
Also, everyone is expected to have a growth mindset. Growth mindset theory, basically, says that if you can imagine more, you can be more and do more. The biggest problem with this is that the "more" that most people imagine involves things that aren't necessarily worthy or obtainable goals. They are goals planted in the mind from a young age by consumer culture. This often looks like having more stuff and an idealized, eternally youthful body. Other frequent goals include perfect, always fun & supportive friends, and spending all day in hobby-style passions earning tons of money for those things that will give the dreamer eternal happiness.
Don't get me wrong. I believe in the value of growth. But, growth sometimes is acceptance and understanding. When you accept yourself, your goals become different. They tend to look more like learning to be comfortable with who you are and who others are, forming real community, dropping the myth of a perfect future that is just around the corner waiting to give you perfect happiness if you just do everything absolutely perfectly right.
Also, everyone is expected to have a growth mindset. Growth mindset theory, basically, says that if you can imagine more, you can be more and do more. The biggest problem with this is that the "more" that most people imagine involves things that aren't necessarily worthy or obtainable goals. They are goals planted in the mind from a young age by consumer culture. This often looks like having more stuff and an idealized, eternally youthful body. Other frequent goals include perfect, always fun & supportive friends, and spending all day in hobby-style passions earning tons of money for those things that will give the dreamer eternal happiness.
Don't get me wrong. I believe in the value of growth. But, growth sometimes is acceptance and understanding. When you accept yourself, your goals become different. They tend to look more like learning to be comfortable with who you are and who others are, forming real community, dropping the myth of a perfect future that is just around the corner waiting to give you perfect happiness if you just do everything absolutely perfectly right.
